CCC XI MOC critiques thread

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soccerkid6
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by soccerkid6 »

Thanks for the critique, Bruce. Choosing pictures for that build was really hard, so thanks for the advice.

Some critique on Wolfpack Fortress (for the Secret Hideout category) would be appreciated:
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Link: http://brickbuilt.org/Wolfpack-Hideout.php
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Takkata
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Takkata »

I cant seem to get the picture to work, but I would appreciate some feedback on my Lothlorien, I did really well in the MELO scoring 3rd overall so I thought I would at least get an honorable mention. Thanks in Advance!

https://www.flickr.com/photos/93970753@ ... otostream/
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josdu
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by josdu »

Could you please critique my miscellaneous entry?

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Set.
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mrcp6d
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by mrcp6d »

Bruce,

Thanks again for doing this, it certainly can't be easy.

Please take a look at this (yeah, misc is a rough category...):
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http://www.flickr.com/photos/mrcp6d/set ... 893786593/
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Rifiröfi
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Rifiröfi »

Bruce N H wrote:This was hilarious and really made me laugh, especially the suspended brown cone. As to the build, I particularly liked the cart design - very clever way of attaching everything using clips. My main critique is that I thought the wall was too greebled up (especially those upside down fender pieces, which I thought just looked odd). I think it would have been better if the wall was relatively smooth light gray, with then streaks of dark gray and the occasional streak of brown (sorry if anyone is reading this right before dinner). Also, I think you should have continued the wall up out of the frame of the picture.
Thanks for the remarks! You are right, I might have overdone the wall detailing to avoid the big gray wall syndome... :)

New week, new entry: what do you think of this one:

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Cheers
Adam
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Purple Wolf »

Thanks Bruce for the critique on my moc really help.

Could you give you opinion on this moc (mainly the custom stickers seeing as the build is practicly the same as my last one.

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More images http://www.brickshelf.com/cgi-bin/gallery.cgi?f=537230

Thanks

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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Gom »

Hopefully you enjoy reviewing all of these entries. :D
My entry didn't do too well from what I gather and would like to know some areas I can improve.
I appreciate your time and consideration.
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Brickninja »

Ok, so it's another week, hopefully I got this right….. :wink: If possible, could you review my "Human catapult" MOC? I tried to stay away from big-grey-wall syndrome and give it some grueling, but again, I have a fairly small amount of parts, and headlight bricks are not exempt….. :cry:
PS: The BBCode is working again! :D
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CCCXI "Trial and Error" The Human Catapult by Brickninja, on Flickr

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CCCXI "Trial and Error" The Human Catapult by Brickninja, on Flickr

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CCCXI "Trial and Error" The Human Catapult by Brickninja, on Flickr
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Ronin Dragonslayer
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Ronin Dragonslayer »

Thanks again for the critique! I learned a lot from that. It was hard to wait a week :wink:
New entry :D
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Link to the set viewtopic.php?f=5&t=24508
Thanks for offering to share your opinions with us!
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Mark of Falworth »

Would love to hear your thoughts on this one, Bruce. :)

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CCCXI Brynolf aff Kwrala by Mark of Falworth, on Flickr
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Bruce N H »

Hey all,

Sorry for the delay - every time I go back to finish up this post, a few more people have added requests. Perhaps I should have just posted what I had rather than try to comment on everything, but too late for that now - here you go, I think I'm caught up.

Brickninja, okay, it's been a week. Human catapult
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I really like the idea here and several of the elements. The catapult itself is good, though maybe a little overly blocky on the front end - maybe if you capped off the brown 2x4 brick on the front of that arm with two 2x2 45 degree brown slopes. I'd also think a little more about color bocking on the catapult - maybe mostly brown with a few accents of another color. Similarly on the ground, I don't think those lime green pieces work. The mantlet is a great detail. On presentation I think you might have been better off going with one overview shot, one from the perspective of the defenders looking down on the attackers, and one from the perspective of the attackers looking up at the attackers. One suggestion that might help the human element would be to show the result of the human catapult, having another fig splatted up against the wall. Maybe then have a few more figs lined up to be the next ones to climb in the catapult, and use the face that looks scared with drops of sweat to show that maybe they don't think this is such a great plan.

Nanuck Stone Meadow Castle
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This was a great castle, it just fell in with an extremely strong category of competition this year. I really liked the mottling of the walls, the way you incorporated a few different tower shapes/styles, that great tree, and some of the nice little life details. If I had to complain about something, it did feel a little to me like the proportions were off. I think this would be improved if there was a large keep inside - as it was, there are these massive fortifications all protecting a small wooden building in the middle. The biggest building here is the gatehouse, which seems out of balance.


Eklund Hrastornj Castle
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As with Nanuck this is a wonderful entry in a category full of wonderful entries. I really love the color blocking of this. I think this is a wonderful example of how the Big Gray Wall is not a bad thing at all, the way you offset it with the dark gray rocks, the greenery, and the brown wooden accents and the black roof on the chapel. I particularly like the subtle insets in those arched sections along the right side of the castle. My only real complaint is that I'd like to see the surrounding landscape extended a little on the front, just so that drawbridge doesn't go across and then drop off. If you extended the ground out front, and then showed a road winding up to the main entrance, that would be great - probably then I would add some more fig life, like maybe a carriage coming towards the gate, and some guard coming out to greet them, or something like that.

One thing I'd really love to see people do, and this not just you, or Nanuck, but anyone who has gone to the effort, time, and bricks to build one of these massive castles, is to take the castle and dress it up to show lots of different situations - change up the seasons by replacing the greenery with snow or fall colors, have a festival or fair with lots of visitors, vendors, entertainers, etc, put the castle under siege from a surrounding army, maybe some sort of ceremonial procession coming to the castle, etc.

Kumplekante Ebbegard
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Really the same comment as with the previous two castle entries, and yours scored even better than those two, since yours was an honorable mention. If I may offer two critiques, I have a general view that MOCs should have a contrast between simple and complex, both in details and in color scheme. If you've got a very detailed color scheme for the castle, I would make the surrounding landscape pretty monochromatic. If OTOH the castle is all one color, I would make the more color variation in the landscaping. Here you've got a lot of different color accents and mottling in the castle, and also your landscape uses different blues, greens, etc. I would agree that this is more realistic, but it sometimes hides the details of the MOC, especially when looking at a small number of photos of a large MOC. My other critique is on presentation and photo choice -- your birds-eye view photo of the courtyard isn't doing you any good here. Overhead camera angles tend to hide details rather than highlight them, IMO, in that the fig action gets reduced to just the tops of heads, and all of the vertical elements get flattened out.

Legonardo Dark of Mirkwood
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This was a pretty amazing build, as recognized by being an honorable mention in the very difficult misc category. The way you achieved all of those crazy angles was pretty stunning. If you're going to force me to nitpick I suppose I could say the tree trunk could be a little more rounded, but I'm really forcing myself to find something there. I guess the one thing I would do to add a little more to this would be to have Radagast doing somehing more than just standing in front of his home. You could have him hanging out with some animals (say that Friends hedgehog), or hopping on his bunny sled, or maybe to take an already epic MOC and make it a little epicer, have a giant spider attacking the home.

RoyalBrickCustoms Roaring Lions
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The faction design you've created is really nice and the decals are well applied. One suggestion is that the flag looks too clean. If the one edge is all torn up, this is a flag that's been around a long time and the whole thing should be worn out. Maybe you could get that effect by repeatedly crumpling up that flag, then flattening it out again, etc, and also fray up the other three edges a bit. My other critique is that the build part is a bit of a throw-away. The category wasn't simply to create the custom figs, but to 'build a scene' with them. All you have in the one scene is a little bit of a tan plate with a couple of plant pieces (and that pic is slightly out of focus, btw).

Luke the Swift - this thread is all about CCC feedback. How about starting a separate thread in Castle MOCs for your build?

Lil_Curt Blacksmith attack
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This build could hardly count as an alternate model. About all you did was take off the water wheel from the official design. Perhaps this set wasn't the ideal choice for doing an 'alternative model' category submission, because there's not a lot you could do with it.

Soccerkid Wolfpack fortress
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This MOC falls into one of my critiques for several of the 'secret hideout' entries - it's not really very secret. I really like the glowing lava, the rough walls, the black roof, and the way you made the front entry on an angle. One critique is that you can see light peeking through around the tops of the arched windows on the front. Also, that brown frame around the flags above the door looks a little odd. I really like that there's an interior - one critique is that the floor is too thin and unsupported - maybe some support beams or arches holding that up.

Takkata Lothlorien
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I really liked your entry a lot and scored it very well. I love that sweeping spiral staircase, the way you did the flets as plates splayed out around the tree trunk and the elegant curve of the bridges. One critique is that I think for these (presumably the guard post where Frodo and company spend their first night on the edge of Lorien) the leaf cover should be a lot thicker. Doesn't a whole company of orcs march through right underneath? If any of them looked up they'd immediately see these.

Josdu Entrance to the Underworld
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I don't mean to be harsh, but I just don't get what's going on in this MOC. I do like the red dragon head, though you should round off the nose a lot more. The tower thing on stilts in the back seems very structurally unsound, though I do like the spiral staircase you added on the back. I think the ground would be helped a lot by sticking with a main color scheme of black or gray, and then just adding in a few accents of other colors.


Mrcp6d First SnowImage
There are some really nice parts to this - I love the rock and snow-scaping, the arch cave entrance on the right, the trees around the hut, etc. My main thing here is that it's too busy, which makes it hard for the eye to focus on details. I would edit a lot out of this - definitely the tree on the right-hand side, that rack of torches, maybe make the roof of the hut brown rather than tan so there's not as much color variation there, and I'd probably get rid of the fire-pit in the front and those two figs, and move the guy casting blue spells on the left down to the middle. Oh, I'd get rid of the gold cones in the corner of the frame. I know that the fad for the past year or so has been to always make a little frame around the base of MOCs, but when the MOC itself is a little on the busy side, adding superfluous details around the frame just add to the cluttered look.


Rifirofi Bird strike
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I really like this and it was one of my top scores in this category. I love the microscale for perspective, the shape of the baloon and gondola, the bird, etc. I didn't actually get at first that the baloon was a frog, and so I was confused by the little cones on the side and the face. One thing that really jumps out at me and I would get rid of it is the rust-brown wedge on the lower left. In fact I might make the hills on the left all in normal green, and just have brown accents for dift along the lower ground. I also would probably simplify the color scheme of the gondola - maybe replace the dark and light gray bits with black. The micro houses are lovely - my only nitpick is that you shouldn't see straight through the one that's a 1x1 technic brick to the green behind it.

Purple Wolf Sunknights
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I've already remarked on your other MOC on some of the wall details that I liked, that you also have in this scene. I generally like the livery you've created, though in a couple of places you can see the stickers peeled up a bit (e.g. the spearman marching behind the king's horse). Maybe waterslide decals would have served you better. Also, I thought the figs were too white. Maybe for the king this is okay, but I don't see soldier's marching around in a lot of shiny white pants. I think the build would have been helped if the ground at the front were the same width as the wall part in back and if you put in some blue for the moat. Having the fortress with a bridge over nothingness to a small little bit of ground made this feel a little bit like a floating rock MOC.

Gom Cedric's misfortune
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Same comment as with others about a tower on top of a rock spire not being very secret. I really like the way you did the round tower - that's very effective, and the rickety bridge is fun, also the army of skellies bursting out of the door. Not sure what the black-cloaked fig is doing going away from the action up the spiral stairs. I'm not a big fan of the chains and would probably delete them. The cliff face on the near end of the bridge seems very unfinished, particularly in this picture.


Ronin First Snow
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I really liked this MOC - it had a lot of fun details in it. The best bit was the guys sweeping the snow off the ramparts - brilliant to have the one that still has snow be all rounded, and where the snow has been cleared you see those jagged details, and the flalling snow is very effective. I would jusggest more snow-scaping on the ground part - maybe cover up all of the tan, and have the snow be more uneven down there. One critique is that if it's winter, those leaves should probably have fallen, and so maybe the non-evergreens should be leafless (or at least the fall color leaves). Also, I would give the snowman a blank face (or just turn the head around), as the face you have there is pretty creepy, glaring at the two boys.

Mark Brynolf aff Kwrala
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I think this guy was probably the weakest of your entries. In several places, particularly the weapon, the cuts aren't very clean, and I also thought the vearious bloodstains were a little messy. Your Roman, Norman and Welsh figs were all significantly better customs, IMO.

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Brickninja
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Brickninja »

Thanks for the critique! I just wanted to note a couple of things, one being that in the story the guy actually didn't get splatte against the wall, and also I don't have any nervous faces. Thanks though! :)
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by soccerkid6 »

I'd appreciate some critique on my entry to the Castle Category:
Kaldrfell Castle
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Link to more pictures: http://brickbuilt.org/Kaldrfell-Castle.php
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by KumpelKante »

now for something completely different:

id like to have critique on my entry in the medival town category:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/kumpelkant ... 090290913/

thank you
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Re: CCC XI MOC critiques thread

Post by Rifiröfi »

Bruce N H wrote:I really like this and it was one of my top scores in this category. I love the microscale for perspective, the shape of the baloon and gondola, the bird, etc. I didn't actually get at first that the baloon was a frog, and so I was confused by the little cones on the side and the face. One thing that really jumps out at me and I would get rid of it is the rust-brown wedge on the lower left. In fact I might make the hills on the left all in normal green, and just have brown accents for dift along the lower ground. I also would probably simplify the color scheme of the gondola - maybe replace the dark and light gray bits with black. The micro houses are lovely - my only nitpick is that you shouldn't see straight through the one that's a 1x1 technic brick to the green behind it.
Thanks for the input, Bruce! I built a 3-vignette story which made clear that it was a frog indeed (I asked you if it is legal to post three vignettes as a single entry) and this one was a bit taken out of context. I have not much experience with microscale FP, so there is still room for improvement.

The next Moc on the menu is: the Legendary Black Beast of Aaaaarrrrrrggghhh
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Cheers
Adam
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